A few years ago, I was completely fed up with myself and how things were going. Mentally and emotionally, it felt like being stuck at the bottom of a pit. I couldn’t imagine a future, and I didn’t care about the past. I felt miserable and lost.
Maybe you’ve been there too, or maybe you’re not at rock bottom, just a bit stuck, uninspired, or unsure where you’re headed. Either way, something inside is telling you things can’t stay the same.
They say it’s easier to take risks when you have nothing to lose. It is also true that to be ready for change, the pain of staying the same has to be greater than the pain of getting out of your comfort zone.
Reading Matt Haig’s Midnight Library made me think, ‘What’s the one thing I’d want to do if I only had a short time left?’
It didn’t have to be rational or reasonable; it just had to made me feel something. And that was the first step in developing a growth mindset.
Ready for Change but Not Sure Where to Start?
Start with something you can control.
Life isn’t fair, and we don’t always get back what we put in. But your effort and commitment always matter. So where better to begin than with a commitment to yourself?
Keeping the promises we make to ourselves is the highest act of self-love and self-respect. It helps us build discipline, confidence and resilience that carry over into every other area of our life.
Figure out what it is you want for yourself and follow through relentlessly, whether you feel like it or not.
Keep Showing Up
Choose something where your effort directly impacts your results. That way, you’re fully in control of what you put in and what you get out.
Showing up for yourself every day might feel difficult at first, but if you stick with it, you’ll strengthen that delayed gratification muscle and things will get easier. You’ll start to expect more from yourself and naturally build stronger boundaries.
That’s why exercise is so good for you. If your primary goal is to lose weight but you absolutely hate the way to get there, it’s not going to last long.
Build your own path to your goals, there’s not just one way of doing things. Find one that works for you and is sustainable with your lifestyle and preferences.
Commit to your journey not just the goal.
Growth Mindset Step by Step
- Decide to Give Yourself the Best Chance to Win
Find something that keeps you going. It doesn’t have to be your life’s purpose, just something that’s good enough reason to get you out of bed and keep trying.
Whatever that is for you, start there. It’s all about the doing. Give yourself the best chance to achieve what you’ve set out for yourself. Be the kind of person that makes goals like yours happen.
- Visualise Who You Want to Be
Who do you want to be? What does the ‘ideal’ version of you look like?
Think about the version of yourself that you respect, love and look up to. What do they do? How do they think? What are the habits they have? What does their routine look like? How do they treat themselves and others?
When we sit down and think about these questions, we can visualise ourselves living by the values and behaviours we want to embody. That vision becomes a guide for the habits we want to build.
- Design Your Day to Day Life
Bring clarity to what truly matters to you, at work, your family life and social circles.
What fills your cup? What drains you? What can you do more of and what should you let go of?
It’s important to think about this as it gives direction to your goals and helps you build a lifestyle that’s sustainable. Understand your needs, your responsibilities, and how to best align them to create the outcomes you want.
Growth Mindset Wrap Up
If you see the benefits of a growth mindset but don’t have one yet, you can develop it.
A growth mindset isn’t about continuous pursuit of ‘better’ or ‘more’. It’s a belief that we have the capacity to improve and do better if we want to. It’s a tool to be used mindfully, not a reason to burn yourself out.
Remember: you might have a growth mindset in one area of life and a fixed mindset in another. That’s normal. A fixed mindset isn’t a dirty word, it often forms from past experiences that once protected us.
As we move through life, our beliefs evolve. That’s part of growth.
If there’s one thing to take away from this post, let it be this:
You deserve to give yourself the best chance to win – whatever “winning” means to you.
